It’s that wonderful time of year when critics, bloggers and know it alls everywhere gather their thoughts and make predictions about their specific fields, whether that be politics, sports or whatever else. So I thought I would jump in on the action and give you my 14 “dad predictions” for 2014.
1. My son will talk more. He will continue to put words together and begin to speak in full, coherent sentences. What this means is that I will have someone else in my life telling me what to do (move over boss ).
2. Food will continue to get more expensive. The struggle to make the right choices at the grocery store as a parent and keep the house stocked with healthy choices will continue to become more difficult. I worry most for those who depend on government programs to help feed their families and fear continued cuts will make many in Maine suffer more next year.
3. My son will continue to try to beat the poor dogs senseless, and they will continue to hide from him.
4. Somewhere, someone will walk into a building and shoot people…again. This will fill my heart with sadness for the innocent who will lose their lives. More sad than this is that our politicians will fight over gun legislation and completely ignore the crisis of mental illness in this country.
5. My son will get over his fear of the potty and will we begin the process of teaching him not to crap in his pants. Because of this I am forecasting a drop in diaper expenses in 2014, with the most dramatic decreases being seen in the 3rd and 4th quarter.
6. Economists will continue to talk about how the economy is growing but very few middle class parents will feel this. They will still all be worried about loosing their job, how they will pay all their bills, save for their kids college, and pay medical deductibles if “God forbid” someone gets sick.
7. My son will most likely hear me say shit or fuck, and repeat it.
8. In Maine while our governor sits in Augusta and is “supper concerned about domestic violence”, a new dad will crack and put his newborn in the hospital. People will condemn him for obvious reasons but nothing will be done to help prevent this from continuing. There seems to be a reluctance in society to talk about the modern dad’ s role in the house and how being a dad can be tramuatizing, stressful and terrifying. So much talk goes into how people need to prepare during a pregnancy but what about after the child is born? What is actually being done to help young families and fathers? Why aren’t we talking about this?
9. My son will be able to ride facing forward in the car. Giving him snacks while I drive will be much less dangerous.
10. Shows like Duck Dynasty, Mob Wives and the rest of that trash will continue to make me glad I don’t have cable, and that my son gets to watch PBS. Every time I watch Word Girl or Super Why with my son I am thankful Romney did not win the election.
11. My son will grow out of 80% of his clothing in the next year. Funds once set aside in the diaper budget will need to be redistributed to the clothing fund in the next fiscal year.
12. Maine will continue to point out the obvious; that we are an old state and face an enormous problem in not being able to keep or attract young people to live here. No one will come up with an answer on how to discuss this issue. Meanwhile, drug use and crime will continue in Maine most populated areas like Portland, Bangor, Lewiston, Waterville, Rockland and so on, making many young families question decisions about buying houses in these areas.
13. As a 30-year-old father I will have to work harder than most to stay on top of new technologies. Not only for career advancements, but to be able to stay ahead of my child.
14. My son will turn two. He will be a happy and sweet boy who makes all kinds of little friends. He will be amazed by the world and learn at an incredible rate. Also, he won’t have to worry too much about the predictions above, making him lucky in very many ways.