Your child learning to crawl is creepy

The chatter starts almost directly after the umbilical cord is cut. “He’ll be crawling before you know it” and “he should be walking anytime now”. This of course is not true. There are many months in the beginning where your baby sits perfectly still and simply cries every time it want’s to move (this is known and the lug-around phase). Still something begins to change after about 6 months. Your baby begins to try to get around on its own.

Much like a zombie or creature from the black lagoon these movements are slow and awkward. This is an easy phase to deal with. Feel free to sit, legs crossed, and smile with delight as they rock back and forth, grab feverishly for things and flop about much like a walrus (goo goo g’joob).

Soon after this “quiet time” the real trouble begins. Your baby’s movements become coordinated, and quicker. Then one day you walk into the room and your child will not be where you left them. They will be in the kitchen, with a bowl in hand and the dog’s water all over the floor.

It’s sudden, it’s fast…..and it’s creepy. Everyone tells you that it is fun to watch but at first I couldn’t help but compare my son’s new mobility with the movements of The Adam’s Family character Thing.








Chasing him around would be fine except that he is frigging fast. No one lest you know just how fast they are going to be. I can look away for just a second (probably to check my Twitter, don’t judge me) and my son can get from the living room  through the dining room, past the kitchen and into the pantry where the dog food and Cheerios are (coincidentally, his two favorite foods).

This “mysterious and spooky” phase really only lasted about 2-3 weeks for me. It was replaced by this horror.

The boy can stand. He can now crawl to a “stable” structure  grapple his little talons around it, and pull himself up. What this means for me – I no longer get to sit down. I now follow the boy from room to room, trying to keep him from having a catastrophic fall (notice I said “try”).

I find myself trying to juggle  photographing the evidence of my child’s ascent into toddler-hood and being ready to prevent his head from having contact with the hardwood floors. I’m 1 for 2 ……every time.


Pat Lemieux

About Pat Lemieux

Pat has it all, family, big old house, dogs, a young son and a quarter-life crisis. He blogs about trying to be who he has always been and be who he now needs to be. He enjoys 90's grunge metal, tasty local brews and the outdoors.